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This blog is about---You! Each and every post is about you. Use it to challenge your usual patterns, as a tool for self-discovery, to stimulate your thinking, to learn about yourself and to answer your questions about others.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

The 10-Minute Relationship Miracle

Learning to listen well is one of the most loving and most useful skills we can develop

 Listening, the art of listening, empathy, the importance of listening is something I have written about in a number of posts.  Here, a colleague, Vivian Baruch, has described a technique that any two people can use and develop.  It's one of the things that a therapist might typically suggest for certain couples who come for counseling.  It is, of course, helpful to have a therapist to coach you in using this and to help with the snafus that might come up, particularly at first.  But, it is laid out clearly enough here that if you follow the instructions, it could work as excellent self-help.  Try it!


  1. Dear Paula Young,

    I agree, listening is the most poignant aspect of a relationship. Any relationship; because without it, we are simply speaking to a wall. Those who refuse to listen are denying themselves to developing a relationship. Yet, not everyone refuses to listen. In some cases, the individual has not developed such an ear to listen, but developing such an ear is within reach. It takes time, patience, and consideration of another.

    Paula Young, I am sincerely appreciative of this post. I am also appreciative of your your remarks on the Canadian Counselling and Psychotherapy Association .

    I'd love to hear from you to discuss possible collaborations.

    Warmest of Thoughts,

    Dr. Asa Don Brown

  2. Dr. Brown. So right you are; listening is an art that also requires a wish-a wish to understand another. But, as you said, most people can develop this skill. Thank you for your warm and inviting comment,