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Sunday, April 29, 2012

The Magic Formula

Keeping your marriage happy

 The formula is:  Date night, once a week.  A weekend away, once a month.  A real vacation, just the two of you, once a year.

This formula can be adapted to your circumstances.  Maybe you can only find time for one date a month, for example.  But whatever pattern you decide upon, it should be sacrosanct; date night is date night, the whole family knows it, and it will be honored.   The date can be simple or elaborate, as your means dictate:   It can be a simple picnic or an elegant evening out to dinner or the symphony.  The point is that you reserve time for a pleasurable activity, that you enjoy together.  The same goes for the short trip away together; it can be a Friday night camping trip to the beach or a weekend in the wine country at an elegant hotel, whatever works for you.         The idea is  to                                                                                                        Artist Charlotte Kruk
 get away from all your cares, obligations, and worries and have some relaxed time together.  By the way, these times are not for  discussing problems You can set aside another time for that.  
I have one couple who like to trade planning the date and the one who plans it invites the other.  If you are a couple who each like very different activities, it's an opportunity to try to please the other. 

You are invited to join in the conversation here.  Please comment below.


  1. This is sound, crucial advice, Paula! For 39 years, I have been married to the most beautiful woman in the world. I KNOW from personal experience that regular time together ALONE must be a sacred priority. Thank you for posting this wonderful advice

  2. What perfect timing. Date night was last night and it was fun. I was reminded we aren't suppose to talk about finances and kids....there's another time and place for that. This is our time, just him and I. Took your advice, planned a 25 yr. anniversary trip just the 2 of us! Definately something to celebrate, it's our journey together.

  3. Here, in these 2 comments, we have one from a man and one from a woman, who each have been practicing this ritual. Notice the joy in their posts.